Go Big Or Go Home

Hi. Just an update on America's Next Top Model, Adrianne won. This is good news since I wanted her to win. Good times. Now we have to see who wins Last Comic Standing. I hope it's either Dat Phan or Rich "The Don" Vos. Um, I don't really have anything else to say, besides the fact that if anyone has a Precor Elliptical machine they don't want anymore, feel free to donate it to a charity. The charity in this case being for #1, Dr. Chiba, XIV. Speaking of XIV, I've decided to have at least 14 children. I have to get a real Dr. Chiba XIV. I realize that's not the "real" way of counting people because you have to go generation to generation, but as great as you think I am, I am not Abraham. I cannot live 900 years. My 14th son is going to be the apple of my eye and will become the greatest human being ever, superseding his daddy. And they will all wear uniforms...


The Runner is sold. It took a whole 5 days.

Ted's drinking!? Apparently he's realized that alcohol is a lovely depressant bestowed to us by God Himself.

If you knew Ted from before he went to USC, it's probably instilled in your mind that he doesn't drink. Never has, never will. Apparently the first time he drank I was there at USC, however I do not remember it. This time, I took photographs so I could remember. And of course I had to dress up for such a momentous occasion.

And wouldn't you know it it's some of the SM hoodrats- Dr. Chiba, XIV, EMac and Melissa. So far in one night it's only been 3, but sometime I'd really like 7/7. That'd be the shit, but needless to say it's hard getting everyone together. In the left corner you can see Willy Most, the 30 year old scientist.

And of course, we have to do what I now call the "PBD Whan Whan."

See usually when you're taking a picture with a homie you point at him and vice versa. Not with Jamie. He points to himself.

Jamie is Douglas P's older brother. Who is prettier? We all had a long discussion but we couldn't figure it out. I promise, this is the last time I will mention this.

In my life, I have to meet certain people. The A*Teens, Prince William and the Hilton sisters to name a few. But I need to meet some "commoners" as well. I've gotten a few drunk calls from this girl with a British accent. So for all of you at SC who've been with me when I's like who the fuck keeps on calling me, this is her. Has it satisfied your curiosity?

This is probably the best picture of Ted I've ever seen.

And here is Del Taco Bonnie. Let me tell you a story. I was at Davis visiting Burkholder and PBD, we went to some parties and came back around 2am. Obviously yearning for some Del Taco, we needed a driver. She was pulling out when I took the initiative and rapped on her window and axed her to take us. Surprisingly she said yes. I don't remember what she looked like so I needed to see this girl as well. So when she was working EMT at the John Mayer concert, obviously I had to go even though I hate John Mayer. I also hate paying for music I hate, and paying $7.50/beer. But oh well what needed to be done was done. GBGH.

My favorite guest at KSQL. I think it's called a Mallard.

Hooters just opened in SF so we went one night. Our waitress spoke almost no English. I think I might be having my 21st here. By the way their fries are probably the best fries I've ever had.

You can't see it but this house burned down in West Menlo. And no it wasn't me. Even though I make idle threats to burn houses down, to date I have not participated in arson. This was after I saw that old lady who walks around at 10pm who looks like death. Whenever I see her I get nightmares have you ever seen her?

One night Burkholder and I went to Malibu Grand Prix (yes we're THAT cool) and I had to take a picture of this ship. Last summer the Mr. Joshua Wang (Ben Wang's little brother) swam in this dirty ass water and jumped up onto the pirate ship and went ARRRRRR! What the fuck was he thinking he smelled horrible afterwards. If only I had a picture of that great moment he would live in infamy...

SC SC. It's amazing how good of friends you can become with someone when the first time you met them you and him talked shit to each other. I am referring to Vince, the dude in the middle.

The night was pretty fun, as you can see in my delighted expression. However Emmett and Burkholder look a little sad, even though they're smiling. Kinda like Gwenth Paltrow. Something about her makes me think she's always sad. This picture is great, it's compooter wallpaper quality.

There's Train passed the fuck out on the drive home.

We went camping. For those of you that know Dr. Chiba, you know that is something he doesn't usually do. However smores and bonding sounded like good time. As we're driving up to our site Burkholder goes, "I sat in a tree. It was cool." The comment was so awkward in implementation that it was funny. Here is Ted in a tree since Steve was scared of "spideys."

Oh look there's a crawdad.

I've never eaten crawfish before so Steve hunted it for me. It was the grossest thing ever. It was molting and the shell was all soft and gross and it was horrible. And no, it was not consumed.

I've seen some ridiculous houses/property in my day, but this house goes the biggest. And no it is not Ellison. I wonder who's it is.



July 23, 2003

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